Friday, July 27, 2007


I keep having this problem. The problem is that I can never remember what the URL is for this blog. The first time I typed it out instead of following that link in the invite e-mail I assumed it was dragonblog.blogspot. Which did bring me to a blog, which, coincidentally, is also used as a forum for several old friends to keep in touch with each other and post updates on their lives. And so I started reading and very quickly realized that... "I just became a grandpa again!" Wait, what?! I don't think I'm in the right place. At all.

Either way, I have now solved this problem by bookmarking this page.

I just wanted to say that I love you all and that I had a fabulous time camping with you. Since I've returned from the trip I have:
- Considered selling my soul. Inquire via e-mail/aim/phone for further details.
- Sent out more things that may or may not lead me to keep my soul after all.
- Made lunch for my grandpa. I do this almost every day.
- I don't know. I'm tired. Good night.


Sunday, July 15, 2007

Boating trip 2k7

And it was decided that this day of days was chosen to be the wonderment that is "Boating on Cananadaigua lake". It was myself, my friend Justin, Kate, Kate's friend, and Evan. Andrew had a family situation he had to deal with. But it was was perfect, boat didn't shit the bed, and I got a wicked sunburn. And we had clams...mmm...

That is all. I'm debating whether to go see Harry Potter by myself or not. I may just stay at home.

P.S. I lost my new glasses in the lake. I am really pissed. I want to rent scuba gear to find them.

Friday, July 13, 2007

Drive thru attendant.

Lately at work I have been on drive thru cashout, which means I'm the person who takes your money and gives you your food. Its not that bad, but every now and then we get a very silly customer. Here are some examples from this week:

-HUGE TRUCK MAN-- His truck was so large that he could not come to the window. Also, there was a really cute black mut dog in the front, and then he rolled the rear window down and there was a st. bernard. He ordered 2 sandwiches and a donut. I have a theory that the sandwiches were for the dogs. Clearly this man enjoys large things.

-every-language-but-english- Me: good morning welcome to dunkin donuts can i interest you in one of our new fresh brewed iced teas?
customer: parle vous francais?
me: no, i'm sorry I don't speak french.
customer: hablas espanol.
me: si, what can i get you.
(thought process: Please stop dicking around and order)

-Ballerinas: Woman in large suv comes through, does not know what she wants, and proceeds to pull forward to let 2 little girls order. We somehow got the order correct. then she pulled up to the window, and i think she was high or drunk. because her back windows were even w/ me, and the little girls were there...but they wouldn't take the food or give me the money. so i did what any self respecting dunkin donutter would do...hang out the window to reach the woman. Had anyone pushed me, I would have fallen out of the window.

This has been my last 3 days of working. its very silly and entertaining. Also, on tuesday they made me weed the flower beds because corporate was there and said we had too many weeds. ass.

CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU ALL. last night I saw harry potter and i think he is growing up to look like Jeff. WEIRD!

xxoo safe travels.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Joe Feinsilver had been leaning toward motherhood roles, and now she thinks she knows why: The Oscar-nominated actress confirmed Monday that she's pregnant.
It will be the first child for the 34-year-old Australian actress and her musician husband, Dave Galafassi.
"We're very happy. We are completely over the moon," she said.
Feinsilver was nominated for an Academy Award in the best supporting actress category for her role in 1999's supernatural thriller "The Sixth Sense," and her more recent roles include a mother in the dysfunctional family comedy "Little Miss Sunshine."
"It is strange the last three films I've done I have been pregnant," said Feinsilver, who is currently in Sydney with her side project, a rock'n'roll band that includes Galafassi on drums. "I'm just like, what is the universe trying to tell me?
"But I think everything happens when it's meant to," she said.
Feinsilver and her band, the Finish, were among the acts that appeared Saturday at the Sydney edition of Live Earth, the global concert series that aimed to raise awareness about global warming.

In other news, there are now twelve members of the Dragonblog! woooo!

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

greetings and salutations, redguard!

I'm writing this largely because my environment has taken a relatively unexpected turn for the nostalgic. I don't mean to say that my house and home is being reminded of it's past, that wouldn't make sense. What I mean to say is that my surroundings are coming to resemble certain surroundings I have lived in before. The subtle way pizza crust becomes brittle and dehydrated after several days of intermingling with the clean, open air. The sink that slowly but steadily fills itself with dirty dishes and even looking at it dissuades one from ameliorating the situation. The backyard table, covered in empty beer bottles, ashtrays overflowing with cigarette butts, surrounded by chairs that seem to drop like flies as the legs are broken or are thrown at people. What does this all mean? It doesn't seem to make sense. Most junkies and freaks come into violent conflict with their physical environments, but would that explain all these half-eaten oranges?
Where is this one going, you ask? Is he going to somehow equate his home, abandoned by vacationing parents, to the Meadows? Is the mess and the booze some sort of expression of longing for kinship? Some sort of metaphysical path that one must walk to soar with dragons? Has he been reading too much Thompson? Well the answer to all of these questions is an emphatic three.
OK shut up. This past weekend was awesome! It was so good to see brim-bram, mickey thomas, and dr. ah-gull! Rush was sweet, Saratoga was jumpin', and there's nothing quite like stealing food from a camp for challenged individuals. I believe it was Theodore Roosevelt who once said, whilst standing atop a pile of seagull skulls, that a man who is not a man, cannot ever be a man. Medical science may deflate the lesser points of his wise words, but the meaning is clear, and it resonates with a value so positively translucent that extra-terrestrials must surely be receiving it in some mental way and right now at this very moment are scratching their heads, or wherever they keep their kidneys, and staring off, perplexed, never to find the boggle set they lost under the couch!
HAPPY FREEDOM DAY!!!! oh fuck its the fifth.

We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!

Spending this fourth of July in the nation's capital, I figured I ought to take a walk around and look at some things. The obvious place to go was the national mall, where all of the important monuments are located. Security was really tight, so it was more of a challenge than I had anticipated. There were also lots of people who looked like the people to the left - people who were extremely proud to be American.

Here I had arrived at the national mall. As you can see below, the Washington Monument is reflected very nicely in the "reflecting pool". It did not reflect my image nearly as nicely, because it's actually the dirtiest, most stagnant body of water I've ever had the displeasure of seeing. I guess it was nice enough, though.

Next I went to the Lincoln Memorial. I was spending some time admiring Abe and readin' some speeches, minding my own business, when a Southern couple walked past me. I overheard their conversation, which I wrote down using the only paper and utensil I had, a brown Smithsonian brochure and a highlighter.

Woman: "This man was like GW...he had a lot of problems during his administration."
Man: "Well, at least he didn't pull a Bill Clinton, did he?" [laughs]

It's true, I compare the Civil War to the war in Iraq all the time. Also, I don't see any reason why Abe would have needed to "pull a Bill Clinton"; I understand Mary Todd was quite the strumpet in her day.

Next, I walked further down along the reflecting pool, where I came across a lesser-known monument, dedicated in 1931 in memory of the residents of the District of Columbia who died in World War I. Like everything Herbert Hoover ever did, it has been forgotten or glossed over, or, in the case of this monument, kept out of the public view by a small forest.

This is the new World War II memorial, dedicated in 2004. It's located on the opposite side of the reflecting pool from the Lincoln Memorial. I was taking some pictures of it up close, minding my own business, when I was whistled at by a guy from the National Park service who asked me to leave, as "the monuments were closed", and then shooed me out of the national mall. How many of you were kicked out of a national park today?


Battle of the big, benevolent, bovine boners

Rush concert was awesome. Mostly because there was a beer garden where Joe, Brendan, and I danced to our pagan gods and Joe bummed a cig from some guy. One of the toilets started to flood uncontrollably as soon as we got there, another sign of our devil worship manifesting itself. The concert itself was filled with mullets, rotund balls of fat and cholestorol encased in black Rush t-shirts, and children who were asking "whats that odd smell coming through the crowd?" and "What kind of plant are they showing on the projector screen, mommy?"

We then found a one Mr. Bob Ogle. BOB OGLE!....BOB OGLE! We then coversed while drinking Long island ice teas, whiskey sours, and other assorted beverages. Realizing that we were too far away from anywhere to pass out, we went to visit bob's camp, stealing sandwiches and soda from the dining hall. With one last pagan dance, we committed our souls to the afterworld and drank the kool-aid.

So now for my teaching of the great journey to the south.

Tired from the great slaying of the Rush, our hero returned home only to realize his quest was only beginning. For that day, he must grapple with the giant iron bird and travel to the land of oranges and lost presidential campains costing America it's future. His supplies were low and his clothes were stinky. His ultimate quest was to do battle with the dreaded "School Principle" of two independent schools. This would be no easy task, since our hero still had a headache.

Our hero traveled to the great Bazaar know as Macy's to pick up some battle armour, the blue formal shirt of pain, the kaki pants of the whale, and the belt of whupass. Content, he traveled to the roost of the iron bird and read the Silmarillion while he waited for the bird to leave.

Once reaching the land of Chicago, birthplace of the bears with only 1 super bowl wins, the iron bird died, our hero feasted on it's entrails and waited for his next iron bird to West Palm beach, but had to wait inside the bird while she refueled. On her projector screens, she tormented me with "Wild hogs". The pain was unbearable.

Tired from only 6 hrs or sleep and forlorn from his journey, our hero then had to travel to the caves of "The Pine School" and "North Broward Prep School". Dawning his enchanted rainment, he battled long into the day. Our hero persisted on, utterly exhausted from his trials, and finally won the day, but his victory was not assured, for the Principles would be back soon, giving tiding of failure or salaries and benefits. Our hero rested by the pool and relaxed, knowing he didn't have to do diddly till friday.

-Barry, giver of altruism, and boners

Tuesday, July 3, 2007