Thursday, November 22, 2007
His name is Andrew Wyland Blanding. Drew for short. Here are some pictures. http://www.puravidavieques.com/andrew/
So I can't wait to spoil him rotten in the future.
In other news, we still don't have internet at our place in D.C., but I have internet at the library of an hour per day. I really did miss you all and the halloween bash, and I expect every dirty detail to be exposed, even if they never happened. My manager at work felt really bad for being incompetent and not giving me that weekend off, so I get an extra day for thanksgiving break. psh.
Not too much to report on the home front. Evan is trying to get a job w/americorp also, so I'll be the only one not selling out to the man. w00t. Also shoutout to my homeslice Jeff about Avatar and frackin Blood bending.
For anyone who has any days off during the break, there's always welcome to come down and experience the joy that is the Wheaton shoppington food court. Speaking of filling our bodies with refuse and alcohol, WHENS GONNA BE THE NEXT REUNION TOUR D' STYLE CHRISTMAS EXTRAVAGANZA!!!!???!!!
OK, Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Joe, enjoy your Turducken, I hope you burn in hell for creating and enjoying such a Chimera beast!, Jeff, I expect nothing less than the best of christmas brews from your distillery (you are the new Geneseo Ale House), Neil, I hope you lose every bet you make with joe and die a poor and miserable death. Brendan, i hope your trip across the sea's have left you jaded and callous and no more than a shell of a human being. Bob, I hope your death will be shortly followed by the extraction of your brain to be implanted into a recently slain supermodel so you will be forever pleased with yourself (and your marriage to Joe will be legit too). Andrew, my brother named his son after you, so your legacy will live on.
And all the ladies, much love, one one..bu-ya-shak
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Point of the story: Joe McManus was there!!!! He was visiting his sister, and came over to say hi while i was giving out stickers and asking people if they wanted to get their picture taken with the mascot, baxter. He is a bearcat with an extremely pleasant expression on his face. Anyhow, it was really fun to run into joe. Huzzah!
ps. we posted again on our blog...1.5 months after the first post. we suck.
Saturday, October 6, 2007
1) Get my stuff together after paying in stores, especially supermarkets and other grocery stores.
2) Put on my shoes (at least according to Kristine. I might disagree.)
According to the cook book, that should have taken about an hour and fifteen or an hour and a half to prepare and cook. It took me two and a half. So much work went into it, in fact, that when it was done I felt compelled to take a picture of the final product before it got eaten. And then I felt compelled to share this picture.
Monday, October 1, 2007
It is a Maine coon Polydactyl cat, and has a grey med-long coat.
So far, we have come up with the following:
Twelve toes, Schödinger, Pinky, Din-Din, Dog, Meatball, Main Moon, Lil' Khajit, Skooma, Arroz Gatonés, HIV, Sudoku, Lil' Bastard, Eek, Ameri-Corpse, Bilbo Baggins, Ignatius Applebottm III, Chesta da Molesta, Snarf, Voldem...."Cat who must not be named", Boner, The Clap, Thundercat, Cumshot, Mushboom, Condom, Dental Dam, Cheesemaker.
My flight departed from Newark Airport at around ten o'clock at night local time on Saturday - after a delay of about an hour, of course. Being a red-eye flight, I hoped I'd be able to get some sleep since it would be around 8:30 A.M. Sunday when we landed in Belfast - but oh, how mistaken I was. For one thing, my seat was directly on the wing of the plane, which meant I had the rumbling of the engine to keep me company all night, even over the sound of my iPod. The legroom was practically non-existent (I was pretty envious of those bastards in first class when I got up to use the bathroom). Sooooo I think I got roughly an hour of sleep at most. After we landed, customs took about two seconds to get through the "WE WILL ASSUME AUTOMATICALLY THAT YOU ARE A TERRORIST/DRUG MULE/SCIENTOLOGIST AND FUCK YOU ACCORDINGLY" nature of the U.S. Customs (For some reason the " and @ are switched on U.K. keyboards...) My Uncle Charlie was waiting at the airport for me, and after a short drive to his house in West Belfast, I promptly fell asleep around ten o'clock in the morning local time. For ten hours.
So, Sunday was pretty much shot. But I woke up early the next morning and we took a drive around the city to all the different neighborhoods, Catholic and Protestant, with murals on nearly every block commemorating this-and-this Republican hunger striker or that-and-that Loyalist volunteer. (Republicans want a re-joining of the entire island of Ireland and are generally Catholic, Loyalists are generally Protestant and wish Northern Ireland to remain under the yoke of the U.K.) Belfast is a nice city, much larger than I thought, with sad reminders everywhere of the violence in its past. It's quite safe nowadays, and rebuilding steadily, but sections are still decayed and decrepit.
After lunch we went to the Ulster Folk Museum, where they've set up a miniature village of authentic and replica 17-20th century buildings from around Northern Ireland - thatched hut houses, mills, churches, you name it. Unforunately my camera batteries crapped out almost immediately so I only got a couple pics, and on top of that we arrived about an hour before closing. Ah well. I had dinner with a few of the family, Uncle Charlie, my cousin Aine and her boyfriend Patrick, my cousin Conor and his wife Kate and their children Rebecca and Charlie (quite the characters, they).
So now I await the arrival of my Auntie Ann - more family visits and uncertain plans I guess until I officially set off on Thursday.
I really don't know what to do with myself waking up so early in the morning. It's... just... not... natural!
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Friday I started my internship of tutoring/observing at East Middle School in Binghamton. I went to six classes, ranging from 6th grade social studies, to reading, and some spanish of all three grades. It was fairly entertaining for a number of reasons. In my first class, the teacher was all afluster and the kids were not paying any attention to him, but they were to me. All of a sudden, the four girls in the back all raised their hands, and when called all pointed and said, "WHO'S THAT!?!" Then i got to introduce myself, and the boys went for reals, for deals. I am out of touch. Anyhow, in 8th grade spanish, one of the girls turned to me and said, "Are you a new student?" kids are so cute. then she asked me if i was Iraqi, and if not what race i was. We bonded over our mutual cuban heritage. It was all kinds of fun. Also, both of the history teachers were super bitches. and one of the reading teachers graduated from geneseo and was a phig. He was very nice, and I want to set him up with either a sister or a friend, even if he is 26 or 27. ANYHOW. just thought I'd let you know that middle school is full of goofy kids and i look like i'm 12 or 13. Now we're watching Zulu. Yay!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Sunday, September 23, 2007
So far, for wagers placed during the fall of 2007, Neil owes Joe $6:
$2, Mike def. Kate in checkers
$2, Colts def. Saints
$2, Giants def. Redskins
For the record, I'm pretty sure I also owe Joe several million euro. There are also some debated past incidents which may or may not have involved me losing a bet to Joe, including Ortiz-Shamrock and WrestleMania XXIII. Will he ever see this money? Not on my watch! As we discussed on the phone before, it will be included in my will, when my corpse hits him back on the proverbial first. I am letting this information be known to the public so that if I die in some sort of mysterious accident, Joe ought to be considered as the first and only suspect and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
By decree, all future gambling tabs shall be accounted for in this post.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Now that we all have that wonderful image in our heads, I would like to say that I have talked on the phone to a good amount of you recently due to my isolation here in connecticut and heinous lack of internet connection for my first 3 weeks...others I have snatched a few words with when bogarting on campus internet in my graduate carrell/isolation box...and I'm loving hearing about all the crazy shit that's going on with everyone now. Brendan-Europe, Becca/Mallo/Jeph-grad madness, Tina-Gallbladder, Meg, Jess-Ro-che-cha, Feesh-?, Bob-<3 and moisturizing, Andrew-park ranger, Inbal-opera, Kate, Evan, Barry-D.C., Neil-where's my diploma? Though I must say, Joe driving a zamboni is pretty much the best thing I've ever heard in my life. My latest crazy undertaking is joining the capoeira club here on campus.
My friend Jill (a loud-mouthed jersey girl who used to be a semi professional ice skater with tara lapinski, whatttt? I'm friends with some pretty weird people these days) and I were going to join the kayaking club, but upon arriving at the meeting 6 minutes late and realizing that yes, we really did just miss the entire thing (also, the awkward leader of the group said soon after "if you're underage you should probably leave, we're going to watch porn now..." and then they put on this extreme kayaking video and pretty much all orgasmed at the sight of it. YEAH), we decided to try something new. My roommate, the golden god P Lombardo, runs a capoeira club, which if you have never seen/know what it is...you should youtube that shit, stat. It's this brazilian martial arts/dance thing where two people engage in a "conversation" in the middle of a circle of people singing and playing crazy instruments. The conversation involves kicks and blocks and hand stands and cartwheels and insanity, all without contact with the other person really, just this dynamic push and pull. It's bizarre, and so hard, but the guys in the club are really nice and don't mind that i make an ass out of myself. I am most definitely the least adept/graceful/strong/coordinated/balanced person there and it shows, but I'm pretty used to looking like a doofus brain so I don't really care. I am learning to do a cartwheel, which I have never known how to do before, so I'm pretty pumped! Basically, Joe, I'm learning self defense and I'm coming for you.
School is good. My new friends are good (though don't yet compare to the sheer amazingness of our love and insanity). Halloween is going to be nutso. I can't wait to see you all (except for Brendan, you ass)
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
This story is about one of the dumbest moments of my life so far, and hopefully also in my future. It is kind of long, but if you're bored or trying to avoid whatever other things you are supposed to be doing, I hope it helps you procrastinate/provides entertainment.
I spent all of last week in the states of Washington and Oregon. This story took place on Thursday, at Mount St. Helens. There's this cave in the park that was formed by some volcanic lava, and visitors can hike/climb through the cave. Keep in mind that this is not really like most national parks, in the sense that it is not as well organized. The people at the park do the minimal amount of maintenance necessary for people to be able to access it, but there aren't tons of paved trails and signs everywhere pointing out to you exactly which trail you are on and which trail you will be on should you choose to take another path.
Anyway, there are two different routes in this cave. One is labeled easy, and the other one is labeled difficult/very difficult. Here is a little detail that will be important later in the story- in the hard route you exit the cave at some point and you walk back to the starting point on a regular trail.
My dad and I plan on doing the hard trail, but before we go in my dad questions a bunch of guys that just came out of the cave and asks them how hard it really is, and if they think I can make it. They say, yeah, it's pretty challenging. You will have to do some rock climbing. There's an 8 foot wall at some point that you will have to climb. But you can do it. So, off we go.
We start walking through the cave. It basically alternates between a semi-flat surface and huge piles of rocks. At some point we reached something that I swear was an 8-foot flat wall that we had to climb, but according to my dad that was not hard, so he is convinced that we did not yet find the wall they were talking about. And this continues for a long while. And then... I see a light. The light at the end of the cave?!
Hmm. Maybe not. There is indeed a hole in the cave, but the cave continues on. I look at the hole and say, no way that this is the end. It is going to be really hard to climb out of this hole. Plus, the cave continues. My dad, however, thinks back to the hard wall we haven't found yet, assesses the situation, and says, no, it is totally possible to climb out of here. I convince him to continue on for a little bit, and we do, and we hit another one of those big piles of rocks, and my dad decides that no, we will not continue to find out that there is no other exit and then have to go all the way back. We will climb out the hole we passed. And this, my friends, is the dumbest moment of my life. The thing is, I was tired, and kind of sick of climbing over large piles of rocks already, and kind of wanted out of the cave already. But really, if I had just paused for 2 minutes to think about it rationally, there is just NO way that that was the exit. It was way too hard to climb, and, the fact that the cave continues without any sign or indication that it is the end of the trail, and the fact that it continues the exact same way it's been all along, should really have screamed at me that NO OF COURSE THIS IS NOT THE WAY OUT AND THE ONLY REASON MY DAD EVEN CONSIDERED IT IS BECAUSE OF THAT THING THOSE GUYS SAID ABOUT THERE BEING A WALL TO CLIMB!!!!!! Yet somehow, I just was not thinking. So, we start ascending up that wall.
The wall had four different levels. So basically, my dad pushed me up to the next level each time and then climbed up after me. The last level was the easiest so I just climbed out of the cave and waited outside. Oh, wait. Since this is not the end, that means that... there is no trail back. But, at that point, I am all the way out, my dad is stuck halfway out and is trying to devise a way to get himself out, and is convinced that it would be nearly impossible for us to go back down into the cave without severely injuring ourselves. As a matter of fact, at that point he is not even sure if he can get himself out of this cave at all. So he sits there for 10 minutes and looks around, until a solution comes to him and he manages to get himself out.
OK, we are out now. Now we just have to find the trail. We start walking in the general direction the cave continued. We try to find plants that were stepped on by animals or humans, assuming it would maybe lead us somewhere. I am farely confident though that humans did not walk in the area we were in. We walk for a few minutes and I start freaking out. We are lost. In the forest. We have no food or water, no way to reach anyone, no easy way for anyone to find us, and my mom was waiting for us back in the beginning/end of the trail. I don't think I've ever been so mad at my dad in my life. A few minutes later I hear this sort of growl/snort type of sound, which doesn't help the anxiety. (Later that day after questioning a ranger we would find out it was most likely a bear.) We realize we are not going to find a trail this way, so we start walking downward. There are a couple of roads relatively nearby, and if we walk in the right direction, we should be able to hit one of them at some point, and from there I guess we would just wait for a car to pass and figure out where we were and get back to where my mom was waiting. If we miss the roads, we're fucked.
We walk down for a while, and my dad stops and says, hold on, I'm going to check something out, don't lose sight of me. And then, we actually find human shoe prints. Probably not ones from the same day, but at least we know we're in an area where humans were at some point... and I start feeling a little better about the situation. We continue walking for a while, and then, like a chorus of angels descending upon us from the heavens, a trail! A real trail! Now I feel infinitely better, knowing that it's just a matter of time until we find out exactly where we are. But wait, there's more. We get to the end of the trail, and found ourselves exactly where we needed to be, back at the beginning of the cave. And it didn't even take long enough for my mom to start asking random hikers if they've seen us and if they could please get some help as soon as they get back within cell phone working range.
That is my story of being lost in the woods!
SO, HERE I AM AT MY FIRST RADIO SHOW SINCE THE LAST TEAM VANILLA SHOW. And in protest of everything that is dumb about not having my fellow team vanilla brethren here, I am playing no song under 20 minutes long, starting with "the odyssey" by symphony x. YOU SEE, instead of talking of talking for obnoxiously long periods of time, i'm playing extremely long songs that nobody but me wants to listen to. HA. YOU GET IT?! TAKE THAT GENESEO COMMUNITY. But seriously, i miss you guys.
P.s. here's me getting ready for my first radio show
Friday, September 7, 2007
Monday, September 3, 2007
Monday, August 27, 2007
Saturday, August 25, 2007
The plan is to scour craigslist for a job that will pay enough to live reasonably, while a search for a better job/grad school applications proceeds.
I haven't set a date yet, but the great organizing of all my old junk has begun and will continue. I miss everybody and want to go and visit everyone, oh economic obligations, how I attest thee.
I just saw Reagan on TV. It's a sign. I'm either supposed to commit seppuku, or embark on a great adventure. Eh, I'll figure it out in the morning.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
I would like you all to come and visit. Too bad for you though, because you can't.
See ya later!
No, but seriously, if you do want to come, you'll have to fill out this brief application...
STÖRMPAD APPLICATION FORM FOR VISITING STÖRMPAD
1. What is your name? (Please write in 4-dimensional script)
3. Who is your favorite Buffalo Bills player?
4. What is your favorite quotation from Surf Ninjas?
5. What is the most important ingredient in a burrito (other than the tortilla)?
6. How many pairs of pants do you own, and if they could smell like any one thing, what would that smell be?
7. Who is cooler, Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan?
8. Who is cooler, table or Paris Lohan?
9. What is the name of your favorite imaginary sport?
11. If you could be one giant internal organ, what would it be and why? Where would you live? Do you like breakfast? What do you do at night there? Do you hang out with Strom Thurmond?
12. Lastly, if you were a chewed piece of gum, where would you like to be stuck and why?
Applications can be submitted in comments sexshin (section)
But seriously, butts.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
1. Putnam Hall is completed, so it can't be earlier than 2004-05.
2. The Integrated Science Facility (or the future Dragoncloud Memorial Temple of Learning as soon as I earn my first $2 million) is not yet completed, but that stupid fence-tunnel between Erwin and Milne still exists.
3. Letchworth Rd. has not yet been reconstructed.
4. At Genesee Hall, THE DRAGONCLOUD IS HAVING A PICNIC IN THE DAMN FRONT YARD.
Check it out for yo'self! Unfortunately you can't save images from Google maps, so go to the page:
Enter "42.800581, -77.822015" into "Search the Map", press "Hybrid" in the upper right of the picture, and zoom all the way in. Ah, memories.
Monday, August 20, 2007
I am using this forum to propose a road trip in November or December. Anyone without any career plans at that point in time is welcome to come. I'll be getting back from Washington in late October and will probably have a desire to drive around mindlessly, potentially in other states. So we should focus that energy on seeing other parts of this wonderful nation of ours. The only feedback I have gotten on this idea so far has come from Joe, who feels "pretty sexy" about the trip. If current trends hold, it should be a 100% sexy adventure.
Comments? Concerns? Counter-proposals?
P.S. say what you will about our ol' college days, at least we never got eaten by bears
BELGRADE, Serbia (Reuters) -- A 23-year old Serb was found dead and half-eaten in the bear cage of Belgrade Zoo at the weekend during the annual beer festival.
The man was found naked, with his clothes lying intact inside the cage. Two adult bears, Masha and Misha, had dragged the body to their feeding corner and reacted angrily when keepers tried to recover it.
"There's a good chance he was drunk or drugged. Only an idiot would jump into the bear cage," zoo director Vuk Bojovic told Reuters.
Local media reported that police found several mobile phones inside the cage, as well as bricks, stones and beer cans
Saturday, August 18, 2007
On Thursday, we had a dance for our campers and it was tropical themed. While it goes without saying that I had the best costume (Carmen Miranda- featuring fruit) I had a counselor who pulled me aside and told me she had to show me something. Apparently her camper really wanted to wear her "tropical shirt" and after the 9 year old had put it on, her counselor promptly made her take it off. I was shown this garment and without a doubt it is the best shirt I had ever seen.
On this shirt were cartoon-y crocodiles, in different colors, performing several different sexual posistions. I mean there were like 30 different sexual exhibits on a sleeveless t-shirt. And just incase you were wondering where a shirt like this might come from, it said "Florida" at the bottom. I took pictures, I need to post them somewhere. I need to own this shirt.
By the way, I've listened to this about thirty times in the last ninety-six hours.
Time for nap #2, tiddly-winks!
Wednesday, August 8, 2007
BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BOB OGLE. BAGLE. CREAM CHEESE. BAGLE. DONUT.
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
Campout, driving, car crash in PA, Mauntauk, drinking, cornhole, drinking, finish Harry Potter, drinking, New york city, Joe is dumb, kwik-e-mart, Great Neck, sailing, informally hired, drinking, home.
Upon my return home, of course all my relatives start coming out of the woodworks. It was nice to see Michelle (sister-in-law w/1 in the oven) and older brother Jeff. But of course my car has to break down, so I was stuck and couldn't flee. I mostly sat around w/my head in a book to make it look like I was there.
Bad news though: the father has finally sold the one house at bristol, which means that he and the Bonnie will be living at the main Bristol residence by the end of August(the one Andrew broke the laundry room door). This means that I must A. find a Job and B. Move the fuck out of dodge. This is gonna be a clencher. Anybody need a roomate?
On a cheerier note, Reagan had a really good time and lots of good pictures will be posted by one Dave Honeywell in the future. As to the current whereabouts of Reagan, your all gonna shoot me, but I left him in the gentle caring hands of Mr. Feinsilver. (Bring the next star wars books too joe, i'm already halfway through the first). I am trusting him, upon pain of death, that he will take good care of him. It'll be good, cause Mr. Feinsilver will be visiting the Rochacha area soon and then we can all meet up, whoevers around. I think a night out to the bar where Kate works would be awesome, mostly cause Kate would be serving us beer, and who among you could deny a chance to hassle Kate at work. I hope they serve food there too, cause then we could tell her to make us a sandwich, a lifelong dream of mine.
I miss everyone like whoa, and want to see everybody again. I think I might just have to build a teleporter solely to make it easier to see everyone. I'll be in my mad scientist lab under the volcano if anyone needs me.
p.s.- Piece of ship, Calamari Cruiser, Feelin Nauti, Jiggie with it, little cheeto, George Jetsam, Cleat-is the slack jawed yokel, Keel-ing me softly, Stem chewer, Yaw'l come back now, knot funny.
Friday, August 3, 2007
(09:23:05) Jeph Wisniewski: Titty Boner Shark
the following categories are acceptable:
-obscure star wars/sci-fi references
(09:23:18) Jeph Wisniewski: Maroon 5
(09:23:44) Jeph Wisniewski: Windalf the Grey
(09:24:17) Jeph Wisniewski: Pastry
(09:24:22) Jeph Wisniewski: Scallion
(09:24:26) Jeph Wisniewski: Wonder Loaf
(09:24:32) Jeph Wisniewski: Pot Roast
(09:25:16) Jeph Wisniewski: Pillow Pants
(09:25:41) Jeph Wisniewski: Shut Up
(09:25:55) Jeph Wisniewski: Oh No! This Water is Lava!
(09:26:15) Jeph Wisniewski: Burning Love Rod
(09:26:35) Jeph Wisniewski: USS I'm Gay
(09:26:55) Jeph Wisniewski: Burning Turd Furnace
(09:27:10) Jeph Wisniewski: Burning Rod Turd
(09:27:20) Jeph Wisniewski: Burning Rod Furnace
(09:27:38) Jeph Wisniewski: In the Cups
(09:27:46) Jeph Wisniewski: The Steppes
(09:27:58) Jeph Wisniewski: The Power of the Dragon Flame
(09:28:16) Jeph Wisniewski: What? You've Never Seen an Idiot Before?
(09:28:26) Jeph Wisniewski: Brett Favre
(09:28:39) Jeph Wisniewski: There's Penis in My Latka
(09:29:06) Jeph Wisniewski: Not Drunk, Just a Sailor
(09:29:20) Jeph Wisniewski: Moist Cabbage Underpants
(09:29:44) Jeph Wisniewski: Keel of Piety
(09:29:58) Jeph Wisniewski: Keel of Piety +2
(09:30:07) Jeph Wisniewski: Keel of Strength +4
(09:30:19) Jeph Wisniewski: Keel of Gay +69
(09:30:34) Jeph Wisniewski: Blow Me
(09:30:56) Jeph Wisniewski: Protogenesis
(09:31:40) Jeph Wisniewski: TillerKrönn, God of Direction
(09:32:41) Jeph Wisniewski: No Wonder This Isn´t Working... It´s My Penis!
(09:33:08) Jeph Wisniewski: USS No Pants
the following categories are acceptable:
-obscure star wars/sci-fi references
(09:33:17) Jeph Wisniewski: i think your away message cut me off
(09:34:09) Jeph Wisniewski: Mastonderböatt, Pillar of Righteousness
(09:34:46) Jeph Wisniewski: Streamline
(09:34:54) Jeph Wisniewski: My Butt
(09:35:10) Jeph Wisniewski: Wind-Catching Butt Explosion
(09:35:37) Jeph Wisniewski: Turboat
(09:35:51) Jeph Wisniewski: Piece of Ship
(09:35:55) Jeph Wisniewski: Piece of ass
(09:36:25) Jeph Wisniewski: Shards of Strife
(09:36:43) Jeph Wisniewski: Dave Matthews Band
(09:37:05) Jeph Wisniewski: Sea Joe Sail
(09:37:19) Jeph Wisniewski: I Swallow
(09:38:05) Jeph Wisniewski: KoRn Unplugged
(09:38:08) Jeph Wisniewski: Butt Plug
(09:38:22) Jeph Wisniewski: AAAAAAAAAAAAAH'
Thanks be to Jeph, the Dragon God of Time, for providing so many options. Other punier ones are:
(23:57:19) rockmon1: the margret thatcher, beacause she's your dream-babe?
(23:27:59) back2mehih02020: flawed gold
(23:11:36) guessgrl102: once i saw a boat called funny cigarettes. i liked that.
(23:10:29) dloozer: dude...do you really need any other name? Galactica
(09:52:46) David 'Serge' Honeywell: the ss bartlett
post more! what a ridiculous spark of creativity!
Friday, July 27, 2007
Either way, I have now solved this problem by bookmarking this page.
I just wanted to say that I love you all and that I had a fabulous time camping with you. Since I've returned from the trip I have:
- Considered selling my soul. Inquire via e-mail/aim/phone for further details.
- Sent out more things that may or may not lead me to keep my soul after all.
- Made lunch for my grandpa. I do this almost every day.
- I don't know. I'm tired. Good night.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
That is all. I'm debating whether to go see Harry Potter by myself or not. I may just stay at home.
P.S. I lost my new glasses in the lake. I am really pissed. I want to rent scuba gear to find them.
Friday, July 13, 2007
-HUGE TRUCK MAN-- His truck was so large that he could not come to the window. Also, there was a really cute black mut dog in the front, and then he rolled the rear window down and there was a st. bernard. He ordered 2 sandwiches and a donut. I have a theory that the sandwiches were for the dogs. Clearly this man enjoys large things.
-every-language-but-english- Me: good morning welcome to dunkin donuts can i interest you in one of our new fresh brewed iced teas?
customer: parle vous francais?
me: no, i'm sorry I don't speak french.
customer: hablas espanol.
me: si, what can i get you.
(thought process: Please stop dicking around and order)
-Ballerinas: Woman in large suv comes through, does not know what she wants, and proceeds to pull forward to let 2 little girls order. We somehow got the order correct. then she pulled up to the window, and i think she was high or drunk. because her back windows were even w/ me, and the little girls were there...but they wouldn't take the food or give me the money. so i did what any self respecting dunkin donutter would do...hang out the window to reach the woman. Had anyone pushed me, I would have fallen out of the window.
This has been my last 3 days of working. its very silly and entertaining. Also, on tuesday they made me weed the flower beds because corporate was there and said we had too many weeds. ass.
CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOU ALL. last night I saw harry potter and i think he is growing up to look like Jeff. WEIRD!
xxoo safe travels.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
It will be the first child for the 34-year-old Australian actress and her musician husband, Dave Galafassi.
"We're very happy. We are completely over the moon," she said.
Feinsilver was nominated for an Academy Award in the best supporting actress category for her role in 1999's supernatural thriller "The Sixth Sense," and her more recent roles include a mother in the dysfunctional family comedy "Little Miss Sunshine."
"It is strange the last three films I've done I have been pregnant," said Feinsilver, who is currently in Sydney with her side project, a rock'n'roll band that includes Galafassi on drums. "I'm just like, what is the universe trying to tell me?
"But I think everything happens when it's meant to," she said.
Feinsilver and her band, the Finish, were among the acts that appeared Saturday at the Sydney edition of Live Earth, the global concert series that aimed to raise awareness about global warming.
In other news, there are now twelve members of the Dragonblog! woooo!
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
I'm writing this largely because my environment has taken a relatively unexpected turn for the nostalgic. I don't mean to say that my house and home is being reminded of it's past, that wouldn't make sense. What I mean to say is that my surroundings are coming to resemble certain surroundings I have lived in before. The subtle way pizza crust becomes brittle and dehydrated after several days of intermingling with the clean, open air. The sink that slowly but steadily fills itself with dirty dishes and even looking at it dissuades one from ameliorating the situation. The backyard table, covered in empty beer bottles, ashtrays overflowing with cigarette butts, surrounded by chairs that seem to drop like flies as the legs are broken or are thrown at people. What does this all mean? It doesn't seem to make sense. Most junkies and freaks come into violent conflict with their physical environments, but would that explain all these half-eaten oranges?
Where is this one going, you ask? Is he going to somehow equate his home, abandoned by vacationing parents, to the Meadows? Is the mess and the booze some sort of expression of longing for kinship? Some sort of metaphysical path that one must walk to soar with dragons? Has he been reading too much Thompson? Well the answer to all of these questions is an emphatic three.
OK shut up. This past weekend was awesome! It was so good to see brim-bram, mickey thomas, and dr. ah-gull! Rush was sweet, Saratoga was jumpin', and there's nothing quite like stealing food from a camp for challenged individuals. I believe it was Theodore Roosevelt who once said, whilst standing atop a pile of seagull skulls, that a man who is not a man, cannot ever be a man. Medical science may deflate the lesser points of his wise words, but the meaning is clear, and it resonates with a value so positively translucent that extra-terrestrials must surely be receiving it in some mental way and right now at this very moment are scratching their heads, or wherever they keep their kidneys, and staring off, perplexed, never to find the boggle set they lost under the couch!
HAPPY FREEDOM DAY!!!! oh fuck its the fifth.
Spending this fourth of July in the nation's capital, I figured I ought to take a walk around and look at some things. The obvious place to go was the national mall, where all of the important monuments are located. Security was really tight, so it was more of a challenge than I had anticipated. There were also lots of people who looked like the people to the left - people who were extremely proud to be American.
Here I had arrived at the national mall. As you can see below, the Washington Monument is reflected very nicely in the "reflecting pool". It did not reflect my image nearly as nicely, because it's actually the dirtiest, most stagnant body of water I've ever had the displeasure of seeing. I guess it was nice enough, though.
Next I went to the Lincoln Memorial. I was spending some time admiring Abe and readin' some speeches, minding my own business, when a Southern couple walked past me. I overheard their conversation, which I wrote down using the only paper and utensil I had, a brown Smithsonian brochure and a highlighter.
Woman: "This man was like GW...he had a lot of problems during his administration."
Man: "Well, at least he didn't pull a Bill Clinton, did he?" [laughs]
It's true, I compare the Civil War to the war in Iraq all the time. Also, I don't see any reason why Abe would have needed to "pull a Bill Clinton"; I understand Mary Todd was quite the strumpet in her day.
Next, I walked further down along the reflecting pool, where I came across a lesser-known monument, dedicated in 1931 in memory of the residents of the District of Columbia who died in World War I. Like everything Herbert Hoover ever did, it has been forgotten or glossed over, or, in the case of this monument, kept out of the public view by a small forest.
This is the new World War II memorial, dedicated in 2004. It's located on the opposite side of the reflecting pool from the Lincoln Memorial. I was taking some pictures of it up close, minding my own business, when I was whistled at by a guy from the National Park service who asked me to leave, as "the monuments were closed", and then shooed me out of the national mall. How many of you were kicked out of a national park today?
HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY! AMERICAAAAAAAA!!
Rush concert was awesome. Mostly because there was a beer garden where Joe, Brendan, and I danced to our pagan gods and Joe bummed a cig from some guy. One of the toilets started to flood uncontrollably as soon as we got there, another sign of our devil worship manifesting itself. The concert itself was filled with mullets, rotund balls of fat and cholestorol encased in black Rush t-shirts, and children who were asking "whats that odd smell coming through the crowd?" and "What kind of plant are they showing on the projector screen, mommy?"
We then found a one Mr. Bob Ogle. BOB OGLE!....BOB OGLE! We then coversed while drinking Long island ice teas, whiskey sours, and other assorted beverages. Realizing that we were too far away from anywhere to pass out, we went to visit bob's camp, stealing sandwiches and soda from the dining hall. With one last pagan dance, we committed our souls to the afterworld and drank the kool-aid.
So now for my teaching of the great journey to the south.
Tired from the great slaying of the Rush, our hero returned home only to realize his quest was only beginning. For that day, he must grapple with the giant iron bird and travel to the land of oranges and lost presidential campains costing America it's future. His supplies were low and his clothes were stinky. His ultimate quest was to do battle with the dreaded "School Principle" of two independent schools. This would be no easy task, since our hero still had a headache.
Our hero traveled to the great Bazaar know as Macy's to pick up some battle armour, the blue formal shirt of pain, the kaki pants of the whale, and the belt of whupass. Content, he traveled to the roost of the iron bird and read the Silmarillion while he waited for the bird to leave.
Once reaching the land of Chicago, birthplace of the bears with only 1 super bowl wins, the iron bird died, our hero feasted on it's entrails and waited for his next iron bird to West Palm beach, but had to wait inside the bird while she refueled. On her projector screens, she tormented me with "Wild hogs". The pain was unbearable.
Tired from only 6 hrs or sleep and forlorn from his journey, our hero then had to travel to the caves of "The Pine School" and "North Broward Prep School". Dawning his enchanted rainment, he battled long into the day. Our hero persisted on, utterly exhausted from his trials, and finally won the day, but his victory was not assured, for the Principles would be back soon, giving tiding of failure or salaries and benefits. Our hero rested by the pool and relaxed, knowing he didn't have to do diddly till friday.
-Barry, giver of altruism, and boners
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Friday, June 29, 2007
Thursday, June 28, 2007
So I now have to work for the father once again, but the best part is that tomorrow I will be driving to the Rush concert. WOOOOOOO.....I think. Joe and/or Brendan, please contact me about what the itinerary is. I just work here, buddy.
Ok, so I will be going to Stonybrook. If people need a place to put extra cars, or anything of that sort, Bristol is pretty close to Stonybrook (relatively). After Stonybrook, I will be camping w/Dave in Mauntauk, then possibly over to joe's (pending) or up to Maine to visit the cousin (pending). And then I'll be going down to Florida to teach and live (pending job).
So much for free time.
By the way....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOE FEIN_GOLD_ENSTEIN_VERBERG. MAY YOUR CUP RUNNETH OVER AND YOUR CHILDREN NEVER KNOW WHO'S THEIR DADDY.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
On a different note, I have just landed an apartment in Geneseo for my upcoming year in grad school. I will be living in a nice little apartment on 65 Center Street. Starting in September, everyone is invited to visit and stay over! Wooooo hoooo! I'm very sorry I cannot take part in the super mega camping trip of awesomeness, but I had a camping trip already planned for that weekend waaay in advance. I AM MISSING YOU ALL SORELY (butts butts butts butts). HOPE TO HEAR FROM YOU SOON!
P.S. Hats off to for creating this blog, it is a wonderful idea I do believe!
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
sketchapocalypse (2:31:47 AM): when am i to visit you in our nation's glorious capital?
Auto response from Broccolifrolic (2:31:47 AM): bed!
sketchapocalypse (2:31:49 AM): slash
sketchapocalypse (2:31:58 AM): how many museums can we hit in a weekend?
sketchapocalypse (2:32:01 AM): figure like
sketchapocalypse (2:32:05 AM): smithsonian, air & space
sketchapocalypse (2:32:11 AM): vietnam wall
sketchapocalypse (2:32:20 AM): jefferson, washington
sketchapocalypse (2:32:37 AM): i heard from a friend today that the bar hopping scene in DC sucks
sketchapocalypse (2:32:51 AM): this is from visiting a friend at american, and i dunno how close youll be
sketchapocalypse (2:32:52 AM): also
sketchapocalypse (2:33:05 AM): that public transportation in dc stops at like midnight
sketchapocalypse (2:33:09 AM): which is whack
sketchapocalypse (2:33:21 AM): how is one to get home at 4 in the morning completely trashed?
sketchapocalypse (2:33:34 AM): this is why the late great robert moses invented the subway and the highway
sketchapocalypse (2:34:09 AM): although it seems he was quite the bigot and racist
sketchapocalypse (2:34:11 AM): for example
sketchapocalypse (2:34:43 AM): all of the parkways that lead from long island and new york city to the beaches are constructed so that no city bus can get there
sketchapocalypse (2:34:47 AM): coincidence?
sketchapocalypse (2:34:52 AM): i don't know
sketchapocalypse (2:35:03 AM): but i'll be damned if the truth doesn't reveal itself
sketchapocalypse (2:35:12 AM): in the course of my investigation
sketchapocalypse (2:35:14 AM): also
sketchapocalypse (2:35:23 AM): what are you doing with your rush ticket?
sketchapocalypse (2:36:08 AM): since i have heard from semi-credible and semi-dubiuous sorcerers that you will have relocated your occumapation and domicile
sketchapocalypse (2:36:28 AM): these are the questions and demands i impose upon you!
sketchapocalypse (2:36:30 AM): in return,
sketchapocalypse (2:36:36 AM): 1 - yes, i am drunk.
sketchapocalypse (2:36:58 AM): 2 - i am prepared to negotiate a deal concerning a large area of newfoundland
sketchapocalypse (2:37:44 AM): 3 - livecareer.com sucks, just saying. it told me i like nature, thinking, and helping, and not persuading or organizing
sketchapocalypse (2:37:49 AM): waste of everyone's valuable tim
sketchapocalypse (2:37:51 AM): e
sketchapocalypse (2:37:53 AM): *time
sketchapocalypse (2:37:58 AM): tomorrow
sketchapocalypse (2:38:00 AM): i plan to
sketchapocalypse (2:38:02 AM): sleep late
sketchapocalypse (2:38:04 AM): drink coffee
sketchapocalypse (2:38:13 AM): though they have this new thingamajig at dunkin donuts
sketchapocalypse (2:38:21 AM): sobe energy coolatta
sketchapocalypse (2:38:25 AM): its pretty good
sketchapocalypse (2:38:56 AM): tastes like a slurpee, with a similar texture
sketchapocalypse (2:39:08 AM): and a similar propensity towards delivering brain freeze
sketchapocalypse (2:39:18 AM): its a little too xpensive, and also its green
sketchapocalypse (2:39:28 AM): but pretty good nonetheless
sketchapocalypse (2:39:47 AM): after i sleep late and abuse caffeine, i am going to sit and read in the sun
sketchapocalypse (2:39:54 AM): and then sail around on a small sloop
sketchapocalypse (2:40:04 AM): with a large box of beer and a friend or two
sketchapocalypse (2:40:29 AM): why just today i took out ms. molly
sketchapocalypse (2:40:32 AM): (good golly)
sketchapocalypse (2:40:40 AM): we had a lot of wind and were moving pretty fast
sketchapocalypse (2:41:01 AM): i just watched an episode of law n order
sketchapocalypse (2:41:16 AM): n which the great captain jack convinced a catholic priest to tesity
sketchapocalypse (2:41:18 AM): testify
sketchapocalypse (2:41:33 AM): even though it was sooooorta privileged information
sketchapocalypse (2:41:56 AM): and then mr. mccoy delivered a compelling argument about how religion is dumb and laws are groovy nd yada yada yada
sketchapocalypse (2:42:02 AM): i wasnt really paying a lot of attention
sketchapocalypse (2:42:29 AM): okay thats enough messages to leave you with
sketchapocalypse (2:42:49 AM): i trust you'll hire an independent firm to decipher these previous messages
sketchapocalypse (2:43:03 AM): each one is laden with hieroglyphics and metaphors and cheese
sketchapocalypse (2:43:40 AM): in the mean time
sketchapocalypse (2:43:52 AM): may the gods protect you
sketchapocalypse (2:43:59 AM): and may allah smile upon you always