In case you don´t know, and you're dead, and you are blinded by fowl... well, nothing. However, I have officially moved into the STÖRMPAD, my apartment in Geneseo. Two recent discoveries I made last night concerning my place: 1. you can utilize the microwave while sitting on the couch, and 2. I can open up the fridge and get a beer while playing on my computer. Combining my living room, kitchen, and office into one room was the best idea I've ever had.
REGARDLESS,
I would like you all to come and visit. Too bad for you though, because you can't.
See ya later!
No, but seriously, if you do want to come, you'll have to fill out this brief application...
STÖRMPAD APPLICATION FORM FOR VISITING STÖRMPAD
1. What is your name? (Please write in 4-dimensional script)
2. Butts?
3. Who is your favorite Buffalo Bills player?
4. What is your favorite quotation from Surf Ninjas?
5. What is the most important ingredient in a burrito (other than the tortilla)?
6. How many pairs of pants do you own, and if they could smell like any one thing, what would that smell be?
7. Who is cooler, Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan?
8. Who is cooler, table or Paris Lohan?
9. What is the name of your favorite imaginary sport?
10. Butts?
11. If you could be one giant internal organ, what would it be and why? Where would you live? Do you like breakfast? What do you do at night there? Do you hang out with Strom Thurmond?
12. Lastly, if you were a chewed piece of gum, where would you like to be stuck and why?
Applications can be submitted in comments sexshin (section)
But seriously, butts.
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3 comments:
STÖRMPAD APPLICATION FORM FOR VISITING STÖRMPAD
1. What is your name? (Please write in 4-dimensional script)
NEIL PARTICK MCLAUGHLIN
2. Butts?
MAKE IT RAIN
3. Who is your favorite Buffalo Bills player?
SHAUD WILLIAMS
4. What is your favorite quotation from Surf Ninjas?
"With malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in, to bind up the nation's wounds, to care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan, to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace among ourselves and with all nations."
-COLONEL CHI
5. What is the most important ingredient in a burrito (other than the tortilla)?
BLOOD
6. How many pairs of pants do you own, and if they could smell like any one thing, what would that smell be?
A) SEVEN
B) PATCHOULI
7. Who is cooler, Paris Hilton or Lindsay Lohan?
TABLE
8. Who is cooler, table or Paris Lohan?
SHIT
9. What is the name of your favorite imaginary sport?
FOOTSKETBALL
10. Butts?
I SAW A TINA TURNER CONCERT ONCE BEFORE I WAS BORN
11. If you could be one giant internal organ, what would it be and why? Where would you live? Do you like breakfast? What do you do at night there? Do you hang out with Strom Thurmond?
I'D BE A KIDNEY BECAUSE IT HAS THE BIGGEST HEART
12. Lastly, if you were a chewed piece of gum, where would you like to be stuck and why?
SVALBARD CAUSE THATS WHERE PEANUT BUTTER IS MADE
You pass! WOOOOOOOOOOO!
STÖRMPAD APPLICATION FORM FOR VISITING STÖRMPAD
1. Mallory Neil Patrick Harris McLaughlin Clark
2. Make it so, Number Two
3. Jeff Goldblum
4. "Ask not what surfing can do for you, but what you can do for surfing...Ninja Ninja Ninja"
5. A blender
6. a. Twelve
b. Jeff
7. The car that could run over for both of them
8. Matt Lauer
9. Turduckhenbowlleyball
10. The equivalent to the Heliocentric Universe
11. a) I would be the liver because then people wouldn't eat me
b)Montana
c)Never unless I am in Montana
d)howl at the moon with liver wolves
e)Yes, because he could use a new liver and be eaten by a pack of wolves
12. I would be stuck to Strom Thurmond's butt. Because then I could rule the universe.
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